Today is a day for dreams. Dr. King had one, and it helped change America, and so today I will remember his and think about my own. Everybody has a dream, some, like Dr. King’s, are lofty and for the good of mankind, some are selfish, some are impossible but are important none the less because they give hope, and some are what drive us day in and day out in our ordinary, regular, often dull lives. People often have several dreams and their dreams may change over time, but even if ones we once held dear fade, that doesn’t take away their importance.
The dreams and aspirations I had as a child are vastly different than the ones I have now, but I can say that one dream has been pretty damn persistent over the years, and that is my dream of being a writer. I don’t mean just writing for myself or my lover, that is a different kind of sweet. I mean reaching many many people with my words. I have often told people that I want to be a writer when I grow up, and I still do. I want to hold the beauty and power of making people feel with my words. Be it joy, sorrow, or even hate. My dream is to touch them and instill passion inside.
Over time that dream has been in the forefront, then pushed to the back burner as my muse fled because of things going on in my life. Angst can make a busy muse, but when life goes about its way on a roller coaster track and you push forward hard to make it up the hill and then have to hold on for dear life as you fly down, the words and the dream of the words, take a backseat. Even in times of bliss they must sometimes be placed there because you are too busy falling in love, or taking care of your family, succeeding at your job, or discovering something about yourself or just making some other dream come true to put your all into what it takes to have the world see and be affected by your words.
I am beginning to live that dream now. I have chased the carrot for a long time. Sometimes I have just written for me because it makes me happy and offers a haven no one else can be in with me, and sometimes like now, I have pushed forward, grasped that carrot, and begun to nibble on the tip. Damn, but that carrot is good. I knew it would be, but it’s savory and mouthwatering. My passion to put thoughts down on a page and create, is touching people.
I have known the joy of holding a book I wrote. Me, my name is on the beautiful glossy cover. I have known the joy of seeing book sales, telling me that yes, people are reading my books. I have known the joy and satisfaction that comes from reaching people with my words. My dream is starting to happen, and while I can’t support my family with my writing, I have in a way finally become a ‘real’ writer. People say they write for themselves, that may be true, but for me, the high, the living of the dream, comes from knowing I can make people feel. Yep, the tip of the carrot is damn tasty. It isn’t the main course by any means, but that doesn’t make it taste any less good.
And so on this day for dreams, I offer thanks to those who have inspired me, given me the drive to keep on going, and have supported me. And thanks to those who are my wonderful readers. Thank you for allowing me to touch your life with my words.