BDSM etiquette

Why The Shame for Hard Limits? 2 comments

This entry was posted in BDSM BDSM and Domestic Discipline Archives Getting On My Soap Box Jolynn Raymond on by (updated on )

Why the Shame for Hard Limits? In the kink community, a limit is something you will not agree to in a BDSM interaction, and no responsible dominant or submissive should ever skip the conversation about what are serious limits when getting to know each other or planning to play. Limits are more than important, they are what define the edge of a person’s cravings and tolerance for BDSM play and roles. The concept of limits gets tossed around in the kink community all the time. Some dominants seem to think pushing past a submissive’s limits is akin to a challenge, and submissives often feel shame or a loss of value for what they won’t agree to do. Both are troubling to me. It doesn’t matter why something is a limit, and you shouldn’t have to explain yourself. If it makes you say no, it’s the end of conversation unless you […]

Top Ten Things To Know About Kink #BDSM 4 comments

This entry was posted in BDSM and Domestic Discipline Archives Jolynn Raymond on by (updated on )

Top Ten Things to Know About Kink If you are of the type who doesn’t want to read up about being kinky, go to classes and events so you can learn hands on, or connect with other kinky people so you can learn kink etiquette, then I frown at you. Learning is VERY important, but I digress. If you take time for nothing else, remember my top ten things all people who are interested in kink and BDSM should know. Any kink or BDSM play is okay as long as everyone consents. You must have full consent by everyone involved. Consent cannot be given by children, animals, and random people in the community who happen upon your public scene. If it involves anyone in that last sentence then your kink is NOT okay. Hurting people who want to be hurt is okay. Tying people up who want to be tied […]

Freedom To Be Rude? 7 comments

This entry was posted in BDSM and Domestic Discipline Archives Jolynn Raymond on by

Today is a day we are supposed to celebrate our freedoms we have here in America. People fought and died so that we could be a free country. The thing is I think half of them would roll over in their graves if they knew how we Americans have taken our basic rights of freedom and changed their meanings so they are not even recognizable. This post is about the freedom to do whatever the hell you want to do regardless of how it affects others, because whether we are talking about the precise expectations in the kink community for following manners about touching, approaching others, public dungeon play etc. or talking about basic everyday stuff in vanilla land, some people missed manners 101 while becoming adults. Now I am one who does not care what fork you use at the table or if you stick your pinkie out when […]